„The Catholic: She wasn’t sure that advice to stay where she was had been infallible as distinct from calling for mere religious submission.

The Orthodox: Because her side of the road was becoming dangerously susceptible to Latin influence.

The Episcopalian: To demonstrate provisional willingness to meet the stern demands of radical inclusivity.

The Lutheran: There were too many sacraments on her side of the road.

The Calvinist: As a sure sign of predestination.

The Baptist: To look for a more promising way to maintain the verbal inerrancy of Scripture.

The Methodist: To remain chosen but not frozen.

The Non-Denominational Christian: Why not? Which side of the road one’s on means nothing in God’s eyes.

The Unitarian: To overcome one-sidedness.

Michael Liccione“ [Der Pontificator beliebt zu scherzen]